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When Love turns into Control

Love is the most beautiful thing in the world! No matter, what the couples do together it
is so much fun and makes them happy. The feeling is so beautiful that we never want it
to go away. And suddenly, in some relationships, you realize they are controlling you.
They start dictating where you can and cannot go. They would want to check on your
social media accounts. They don’t want you to look beautiful without them.
Something which was so beautiful is making you now feel trapped and frustrated. But
have you ever wondered why the other person controls you? It’s because you let them
control you. You have not set your limits as to how would you like to be treated. You are
scared of losing your partner, so you let them have their ways. It is also possible that
a person who is controlling or dominating in a relationship, is the insecure one in the
relationship or just loves bossing around or this is the way he has been brought up.
Whatever their reasons, please do not get okay with accepting their controlling nature.
You have to at one point tell them, that you can take some decisions in your life on your
own. Let them know that their expressing concern is fine, but going overboard is not
acceptable. Remember love is a partnership, not ownership. We feel that they are madly
in love with us, but suddenly their love becomes obsessive and toxic.
It’s their insecurities and ego and their need to boss around. Don’t let anyone boss you,
you are not their employee or puppet. If someone makes you feel guilty when you are
spending time with friends, it’s controlled. You have the right to live your life your way.
When they are pulling you away from other people or making your life all about them,
then they are control freak. When they tell you that you are incompetent without them,
they are trying to make you weak. See whether they are emotionally blackmailing you or
getting angry with you. Whenever you feel they are trying to do any of these things,
clearly and assertively but with love tell them that you are not happy like this.
A healthy relationship is one where two independent people just make a deal that they
will help make the other person the best version of themselves. They let you be the way you
want to be. They are happy for you if you are happy.
Please always set your boundaries in any relationship. And it’s never too late. We can
always with love say things and if they really love us, they will understand. If they do
not, they will create a scene. And then you know what needs to be done!

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